February 11th, 2009
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Excellent way to determine which religion to follow: which one has the most terrifying punishments?
An eternity without fruit would suck.
It’s not the fruit that worries me.
It’s the nuts.
Then I’m going with Zoroastrianism…i hate the cold dammit
I’ve always thought that the fear of hell brought more people to christianity than the reward of heaven. Perhaps this could explain why harps don’t sell as easily as nomex underwear?
Author. Fruit related atheism. Excellent.
I used to work in Saudi Arabia and there was an old proverb that went:
“For sexual pleasure you can get by with a woman.
For sexual delight you need a young boy.
For absolute sexual bliss you need a water melon”
I declined melons and bananas – for obvious reasons.
Its almost as if heaven was being described according to the limited imaginations of semi-literate bronze-age nomads? But, no- that would be silly, wouldn’t it?
Makes sense. The Christians just hate fruits.
I’ll get my coat…
Yes! We have no bananas, or do we?
Indeed, the paradise those nomads dreamed of sounds an awful lot like an oasis in the desert.
Hell for them is not a raging blizzard nor the sun reflecting blindingly (literally) off the snow while it is cold enough to freeze mercury. I would not expect to find any indication in their writings that they had access to omniscient knowledge of the rest of their world.
It was only their access to writing that allowed so much of their emotional appeals to ignorance to be passed on to their descendants.
Well, this cartoon has answered a recent point of curiosity for me. That was whether Islam more closely copied the Jewish or Christian punishment model. Studying religion like this won’t make me a theologian, I hope.
Don’t forget the 72 raisins awaiting the good martyrs when they arrive in heaven
There may be fruit in heaven, but hell sounds like a great place for a bbq?
But what if the bananas are really, really big …
Ha! I bet Ray Comfort never even considered how his “banana” model could validate Islam.
It wouldn’t be heaven for me without internet access. Is that offered by anyone?
Whoops, wrong email address above, no pic….
Huh, where’s my original wish for internet access in heaven gone? Is the site playing up?
It’s not a banana in my pocket and I’m not a follower of Islam,
I’m just happy to be here.
Apparently very happy, taking the temperature into consideration.
grouchy-one, speaking of raisins – has anyone worked out who actually counts and assorts all those raisin plates? Is that God’s second-worst punishment for recalcitrant angels, those who don’t really question his authority but dare to think they don’t like him that much?
Or is there some obscure nook in hell where sinners count raisins into small bowls (lots of scenario creativity permitted there)?
Since God always knew how many would enter heaven and when, has he prepared all the bowls at one instant, or does he make them in sets?
Lots of stuff J&M could discuss in future episodes. Full permission to use these ideas hereby given to Author. I’d be honored 😉
[email protected] JoJo!
I was once having a chat to a friend of mine who was commenting on how muslim paradise mainly catered for men. I asked him what he thought muslim paradise for women would be and his response was:
Habitat at Ikea prices
Felix, I imagine the administration of raisins would fall to the most dutiful and pious beaurocrats from Earth; to them this would be a form of eternal reward.
I guess any new arrivals that had managed to get into heaven by blowing themselves and their surroundings up would be fed into the raisin requisition process, a bewildering web of forms, approvals and a maze of departmental corridoors that would eventually return the applicant back where they started; an ironic form of eternal torture for those that forgot the bit in the good book that said not to kill other people.
I always wondered if those Xtians/Catholics/Muslims would still live their lives of virtue without the “BIG” payoff in the end. The other morning one of the more religious persons I work with asked how I was doing. My reply was “I’m breathing.”, their reply was “Better than the alternative.” I always have to play the Devils advocate and say “Isn’t heavan better than this place?” You geussed it deer in the headlights………
Hey, maybe Christians DO hate fruits! Remember when Jesus cursed the fig tree?
How would Islam reconcile the fallacy in Mo’s thinking – Bananas are herbs, not fruit!
Oohoohhohoohoohh jihad on me.
I’m putting my money on the beer volcano and the stripper factory.
I love love love this comic strip. But how on earth has the cartoonist not been blown up? Have Muslims just not discovered it?
I’m quite certain they have – which I assume is the main reason for the cartoonist’s name being Author.
Author bypassed this little problem by using a body-double of Mo. There can be no blasphemy from using a body-double right? Yes the irony meter is vibrating crazily…..
I think I went to Islamic heaven last summer… on the other hadn it could have just been a Bali hotel. The fruit basket on arrival confused me.
Stripper factory sounds good to me!
i think u guys are missing all the sex muslim heaven has. the quran and hadiths describe with great detail the horis or the virgin girls. there are mention of young boys even (some disagreement whether they are available for sex or not).the suicide bombers get 72 virgin houris!! besides,lots of islamic sex is promised in this life too.for men that is.
yeh.i too wonder why these cartoonists havent been blown up. even south park. but when its a news paper they go around killing people.wtf is wrong with em.
It’s not the fear of hell that brings people to religion. It’s the fun of smugly thinking about the torments all those other people will endure.
This strip is so educational! I had no idea that bananas were known in medieval Arabia.
i am ready to sell my beliefs for eternal melon and water-melon resources.
Could this be a nod to “skin” where it is mainly a praise of bananas?