A new one. Literally.

Hat tip to Why Evolution is True.

Discussion (49)¬

  1. BarryBiscuits says:

    How do you deal with the ‘making images of Mo’ shenanigans? Have you been threatened or do you have to remain anonymous?

  2. Author says:

    @BarryBiscuits – I’m anonymous, but I don’t get much flak anyway.

  3. WalterWalcarpit says:

    Nice one.
    Sometimes this site is like a ‘Word of the Week’
    But why USB – I’d have thought Jesus would have wireless connection to the ether.
    Just saying …

  4. Myrhinne says:

    I’ve only just come off ebay about a minute ago. Surely more than coincidence? There must be a higher power at work here.

  5. HaggisForBrains says:

    I want one to go with my irony meter. Are there any left on Ebay?

  6. HaggisForBrains says:

    @ BarryBiscuits – check out the “first” cartoon (click below the final square) – it’s not really Mohammed (Piss Be Upon Him).

  7. DKeane says:

    I am literally impressed

  8. Al West says:

    Why not remove the need for clumsy hardware and turn it into a website? My USB ports are all full.

  9. Acolyte of Sagan says:

    Author, anonymous my bottom! Your name is Mohammed Jones, and there can’t be many of those in the phone book. Methinks you have divine protection.

  10. jerry w says:

    Hermeneuticon V2.0 update (available soon) will be shipped with the religious wingnut appeasing equivalent of firewire, it will be called “hellfirewire”.

  11. jerry w says:

    N.B., Hellfirewire is compatible with Mac’s equally ominous sounding Thunderbolt, but the needed Brimstone adapter is sold separately, and as always batteries are not included.

  12. Henry Ford says:

    I thought the hermeneuticon v 2.0 was going to be wind powered

  13. machigai says:

    I wants one.

  14. So who sold it on ebay? Rowan Williams? Giles Fraser? Theo Hobson?

  15. Author says:

    @Ophelia – Somebody calling themselves B10L0g0s_666

  16. Ha. That’s all I can say. Ha. All the witty comments seem to have been taken.

  17. Ha! Funded by the Templeton Foundation then. Makes sense.

  18. Nassar Ben Houdja says:

    Literal and metaphorical questions
    The beer slinger inquires
    In the urinal a tablet disolves slowly.

  19. Kevin Alexander says:

    Damn, I paid full retail for mine!

  20. The Vicar says:

    Almost entirely off-topic, but: could you apply to have these auto-submitted to the Planet Atheism aggregator? Some of them pop up there via other people’s repostings, but not all do.

  21. FreeFox says:

    @HfB: Doesn’t wash. The body double is creating an image of the prophet through impersonation. Blasphemy.

  22. JohnM says:

    F*ck you, Jesus. I held back my bid for it until there was just 5 seconds left – and the tosser still got his overbid in.

  23. hotrats says:

    Nassar old mate, you are getting to be a real artist with the haiku. Today’s is a gem. Can we hope that your struggles with the demanding limerick form are behind you?

  24. Acolyte of Sagan says:

    Hotrats, still think I was mistaken about Nassar hiding his light under a bushel, so to speak? He’s had these sudden ‘improvements’ before, only to go back to writing as though the English language and he were complete strangers, usually after somebody remarks on those improvements.

    FreeFox, you’re right, of course. When somebody takes offence at a pineapple given the prophet’s name, a body-double has no chance.

  25. suffolk blue says:

    AoS – you’re not suggesting perhaps that our bard is two or maybe three people in one, are you? How on earth would that work?

  26. Mike says:

    Am I the only one out there who had to look up hermaneut?

  27. @Mike, no you are not. I love big words, but I had to look up that one too. Don’t feel bad. There’s no shame in not knowing a word.

  28. IanB says:

    @Mike Nope it was a new one on me too

  29. HaggisForBrains says:

    @ suffolk blue

    How on earth would that work?

    Not on earth – in heaven.

  30. HaggisForBrains says:

    @ Mike, DH, &IanB – don’t you just love Google. Just right click and search. That’s the only way I can find my way around some of the more philosophical websites.

  31. Acolyte of Sagan says:

    Mike, me too.

    Suffolk Blue, the Nassar Trinity does have a nice ring to it, but no; he’s the acceptable face of Trollism; no J&M cartoon would be complete without a verse from him. It’s just that he sometimes forgets he’s playing the part of a semi-literate, creationist Islamist and exposes his real talent and knowledge.

  32. HaggisforBrains. You got it. I love Google. Must use it twenty or thirty times a day. Any time I’ve got a question about ANYTHING. What a great world we live in. A good slice of superficial human knowledge at our fingertips. No longer any need to keep facts in my brain. Which is a good thing because the brain is a sieve these days.

  33. misanthropope says:

    suffolk blue:


  34. hotrats says:

    We’re all familiar by now with your ‘NBH is intellectual posing as moron’ conspiracy theory, which is arguable, even if it raises more questions than answers about his motives.

    But calling the dear lad a troll is overdoing it; admittedly something of a sideline sniper (he never replies to questions), he often speaks out against hypocrisy, and his atheist-baiting, which is never abusive, seems to have mellowed over time.

    From looking at his contributions before he took up versifying, I have to say that English is definitely not his first language, and his occasional flashes of grammatical insight are just that – every post a roll of the dice, and his ‘relapses’ a statistical probability, not a response to praise. Perhaps a boring explanation, but it fits the facts, and satisfies Occam.

  35. hotrats says:

    Mike et al:
    It seems to be a week for stretching vocabulary; in the foreword to the new J&M book (http://richarddawkins.net/news_articles/2012/10/5/folie-dieu-by-mohammed-jones#.UHfYHfl26Fc) RD makes refers to ‘apophatic obscurity’ and ‘apophatuous obscurantism’.
    Down with the kids, that’s our Dick.

  36. Acolyte of Sagan says:

    Hotrats, we’ll have to agree to disagree. ’tis a moot point anyway unless Nassar deigns to put a short halt on flaunting his modesty behind his burka of silence.

    Anyway, this is totally unrelated to anything here, but it’s just too funny not to share among one’s friends, so I implore you all to witness for yourselves the stupidity that is this caller to a radio station; http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CI8UPHMzZm8

  37. the bonus says:

    How does the hermeneuticon work? It bombards the text in question with Higgs Bosons and measures the quantum energy of the BS particles that are ejected. This obviously works best on religious texts as the Higgs is, you’ll remember, the God particle.

  38. Acolyte of Sagan says:

    Anybody else want to help ensure that little Malala’s bravery and suffering isn’t totally in vain?

  39. noreligion2 says:



  40. steeve says:

    Thanks AoS. We all know about Malala now, but how many girls have they shot that we don’t know about? Never mind a BS detector; when will we get a ‘murdeous b*st*rds’ detector?

  41. Acolyte of Sagan says:

    Steeve, “when will we get a ‘murdeous b*st*rds’ detector?”

    There are two currently available, the Bible* and the Koran*. If you see somebody waving one around and shouting a lot, the chances are there’s wickedness coming.

    *Also available on ebay. Find it in the ‘stupid things for stupid people’ category alongside the hermeneuticons.

  42. JoJo says:

    In all fairness, the Malala shooting g did provoke widespread condemnation in Pakistan. But not a great deal of action. Politicians speaking out against the Taliban or against blasphemy laws, for example, stand to catch a bullet themselves.

  43. Furia says:

    Hey, what’s happened with Jesus’ beard?

  44. MarkyWarky says:

    @Furia, he’s dyed it dark as a metaphor for the dark days that will prevail until his second coming, which in turn is represented by his blonde hair.

    Or some such theological bollocks.

  45. Acolyte of Sagan says:

    That’s not a beard, it’s a mould growth; he’s been undead for 2000 years.

  46. the bonus says:

    Hmmm thinking about branding…the iHermeneuticon is a bit of a clunky name. What about the iBull?

  47. machigai says:

    I can’t get to the comments on the next comic.
    “Page not found”

  48. machigai says:

    found it

  49. bill says:

    Just an observation – the comics don’t show up in Google Reader any more. Click-through works okay.


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