Merry Christmas to all our readers!

Discussion (45)¬

  1. Solo Hands says:

    Merry Christmas to everyone and may you all have a truly wonderful New Year.

    I, too, am a “fulfiller of prophecies”. She said “You’ll be sorry if you do.”

    I did. I was.

  2. Solo Hands says:

    … but not too sorry as it was fun. 🙂

  3. Nakul Nitin Gote says:

    Gender Pronouns: Helping people know that people want them to know how superemely kind and compassionate they are since 2019.

  4. Mark Jones says:

    Pronouns: Thee / thou / thy, surely!

  5. M27Holts says:

    Solo hands…probably explains your moniker as well…

  6. Okapi says:

    That is too good. Thou hast excelled thyself there

  7. They/them – because of THE TRINITY, GEDDIT???


  8. M27Holts says:

    Yeah, but in the interest of science, which one of the Trinity do we put in the box?

  9. Jesus F Iscariot says:

    The Jews hounded the Romans about crucifying Jesus. So they nailed Them up. So where can I buy the crucifix statuette of Them displaying Their nice set of mammaries along with Their already stunning abs? They has a nice body exposed by the g-string.

  10. Laripu says:

    Ah, it’s hairy crispness time again. Happy arbitrary distinction of time.

    I want to be sufficiently progressive that I use whatever pronouns anyone wants, but frankly, I’m an old curmudgeon who isn’t used to that and I will use pronouns that fit the appearance of gender.

    Then they can call me whatever name you apply nowadays to people who don’t care if they misgender whatevs.

    I like the joke. 🙂

  11. BillR says:

    Shouldn’t They/Them be capitalized?

  12. Raiderfra says:

    So disappointed that twitter account isn’t real!

  13. zachw says:

    Oh man, how many people went on twitter like me to see if an account was really setup? Sad face.

  14. jb says:

    When I was in Catholic school I was taught that, despite the way He is traditionally referred to in the Bible, God has no gender, and is neither male nor female. So yes, given the additional fact that He is Three, this looks like one of the few cases where They/Them might actually be the appropriate pronouns.

  15. bmorebird says:

    When searching twitter for @theJfromJandM, I received the following message, including after I removed the settings for displaying sensitive content:

    “No results for “@theJfromJandM”
    The term you entered did not bring up any results. You may have mistyped your term or your Search settings could be protecting you from some potentially sensitive content.”

    I wanted to tweet to it. Sad.

  16. Author says:

    Try again, bmorebird.

  17. Donn says:

    And as a twitter celebrity, he has the advantage that he’s already pre-crucified.

  18. Josh says:

    This site needs a Like button!

  19. Peter Nason says:

    We agree with removing gender from basic grammar as the fluidity is too cumbersome and rarely is it critical to the meaning of the sentence. Same with plural, since we are headed down that road. Currently, you can go your whole life without distinguishing between plural and singular for both 2nd and 3rd-person. So, to keep everything simple, we would prefer to complete the conversion and have the three pronouns be: We/you/they. However, if that is not to thy liking, I would have us make all persons distinct in terms of number and remain gender-neutral. S: I/thou/it P: We/you/they.

  20. Son of Glenner says:

    And a Merry Christmas to Author and all regulars at the Cock & Bull.

  21. Okapi says:

    Where is Mo’s?


  22. M27Holts says:

    Tis real and following….Jesus Saves…but Ronaldo nets the rebound…

  23. Anonymous says:

    Love it…it took me a few moments to figure the two jokes built in (inclusivity and trinity) but the joke is so concise and direct it almost calls for a “rim shot”!

  24. Albert Beale says:

    Thanks!! An absolute laugh-out-loud one this week! Wonderful. (Except that I’m reading this in the muddle of the night and almost choked trying to stop myself laughing so loudly that I woke anyone up…) I trust you all enjoyed and [paganly] celebrated the moment of Solstice (at tea time on Tuesday, British time), and are now having a wonderful Saturnalia.

  25. Len says:

    Ha ha, excellent 🙂 Now following theJ, can’t find theM 🙁

  26. Atanwat says:

    Didn’t Twitter increase the maximum allowed length for posts to 240 characters?

  27. Vanity Unfair says:

    I really like the way the heading changes from exultation to exasperation in frame four. Or is that just me?

  28. Deimos says:

    A cool Yule and happy Saturnalia from the only British city to still celebrate ancient Roman festivals. I have done the usual late autumn jobs of sand scrubbing my armour, mending the plumes and lanolin rubbing my many leather fasteners.

    So it’s either a parade or roman pride is late this year. So it’s now almost time for the
    Feast and the Boxing Day gladiatoral hunt sabotage contest.

  29. Barge Arse says:

    Bullseye. As soon as I see pronouns preened, I bypass.

  30. DW says:

    Peak 2021: why attack a straw man when you can attack a straw gender-nonconformist?

    Go back in time and you can see this strip challenging the powerful: those who denigrate women, kill LGBT+ people, mutilate children’s genitals, sell fake cures to the sick, hoard money taken from the poor, seek exemption from the laws that apply to others, try to hinder education in favour of dogma, and try to regulate the minutiae of others’ lives.

    Now: mocking really-not-powerful people who ask others to use the pronouns that reflect their self-perception (something that I suspect most of us gender-conforming people would do if it didn’t already happen).

    Next week: a straw shark in a beard and a dress swims up lavatory pipes to eat women, so Mo jumps over it in water skis?

  31. Holms says:

    DW, mocking religions and trendy beliefs is vintage J&M.

  32. M27Holts says:

    Deimos, Donning a centurian outfit, presume your lady wife will be wearing a similar 2nd century outfit? Very elaborate role playing indeed?

  33. Rob Barnett says:

    I’ve always fancied dressing up as a Spartan Hoplite…need to work on my abs first though…

  34. Deimos says:

    Reply to m27: actually the Domina likes to wear her 3rd century Celtic Lady gladiator kit (we saw her in a documentary a while back). It’s a bit chilly round here but cloaks conceal a multitude of everything.

    Reply to rb: after many years of trying I finally got a fairly realistic Hoplon shield this summer, it weighs a ton. I wouldn’t recommend carrying one, as even mounting it on the wall took 3 people and nails that resemble javelins.
    Those Spartans were genuine tough treefeckers. If that last word isn’t familiar then read “Gates of Fire”, my favourite book ever written.

  35. Solo Hands says:

    How so, M27? The “solo”, the “hands” or the composite completeness of it? Methinks you mean the praenomen but confusion settles like a gentle Cherenkov coloured snow upon my tea-less self.

    It’s been a hard day. Indeed, it’s been a hard fifty years since 2019 and it is not yet entirely over.

    A Merry Christmas to all and may your New Years be full of joy, warmth, hugs and good things.

    As an aside to the Good Author: have a lovely Christmas and thank you for all of the funnies. I tried to Twit the good J. from J&M but I am unable to progress past the log-in page. It seems that I would need a used-id. That is something I am rather reluctant to acquire.

    My loss, my fault, not yours nor theirs. I am sure I’ll survive without. 🙂

  36. Solo Hands says:

    USER-id, not “used-id”, though were I to acquire the former I feel sure it would rarely be the latter.

    Off to rectify the tea-less state by melding ingredients in vessels. As I’m sure many were going to suggest. 🙂

  37. samhuff says:

    Jesus saves; Moses invests.

  38. Dr John the Wipper says:

    Jesus saves; Moses invests.

    Made me smile, but then I realised why I it hadn’t considered it earlier.

    It works in English, because “save” can also mean “rescue”, but in any other language “collecting anything, eg money” can not be used to mean anything resembling “rescuing”

    In other words, if I want to use it, that can only be towards people with a decent understanding of English, who do not consider it strange that I quote English to them…

  39. jb says:

    Wordplay is not only difficult to translate from language to another, it can also be lost to the passage of time. For example this passage from Shakespeare

    And so from hour to hour we ripe and ripe,
    And then from hour to hour we rot and rot;
    And thereby hangs a tale.

    no longer carries all the meaning it had for the original audience.

  40. Laripu says:

    jb – thanks for that. I learned something yet again from this site. Shakespeare was great, and funny too. I wonder whether the English language will ever see anyone as talented and prolific.

  41. Martin says:

    Just to say Happy Christmas and New Year to all.

    And also to say RIP for Keri Hulme, who died yesterday. She described J&M as “rays of sanity in this befuddled world” according to the sidebar above. (Her Booker winner “The Bone People” is a real Marmite of a book – people either loved it or hated it. I loved it.)

  42. Postdoggerel says:

    I was introduced to marmite by s lovely Welsh lady named Meryl. I loved it. Others say it is best suited for use as a hemorrhoid salve.

  43. M27Holts says:

    Marmite on your toast beneath a generous layer of ultra mature English Cheddar then toasted brown….hmmmm

  44. Bvereshagen says:

    I am now following @theJfromJandM. Haven’t done that since I walked away from the Catholic church 51 years ago.


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