If the Koran hadn’t been written, nobody would have known about that. Phew! Close call.

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Discussion (28)¬

  1. I’m ever so grateful. Not.
    Eskimo: If I’d never heard about Hell and Jesus Christ, would I go to Hell when I die?
    Missionary: No you wouldn’t.
    Eskimo: If you want to save me from Hell, why did you tell me?
    Not original to me, and I suppose I should leave the jokes to Author. He’s good at them. Speaking of which, thanks for another good laugh. 🙂

  2. Nassar Ben Houdja says:

    The problem with things that people know
    Is it is not necessarily so
    Every time someone shouts “absolute”
    Another comes up with “refute”
    And another genius proves that they blow.

  3. HaggisForBrains says:


    I’m sure PZ will approve.

  4. HaggisForBrains says:

    Please note that my comment was addressed to the comic, not Nassar Ben MacG.

  5. ddragoonss says:

    But what about greek hades/tartarus and New Testament itself?

    Koran is a new shit(600 CE) and hell is really old shit.

  6. Runar says:

    @Nassar Ben Houdja – that’s a nice limerick, but the meter is a little off. Here’s a rewrite:

    The problem with things people know
    They are not necessarily so
    One shouts “absolute”
    Another “refute”
    And a third genius proves that they blow

    I hope you’re not offended by my editing.

    @Darwin Harmless – some years ago, I read about a Christian missionary who came back from a trip to South America. He had a complaint about the people he was trying to convert. One of the things he mentioned was that, “…their language has no words for war or sin or evil, so we had to try to teach them about that before we could get to the bible.”

    Not only were they corrupting an innocent culture, but, unlike your story about the Eskimo, it wasn’t a joke.

  7. Chip Camden says:

    @Runar: Christian evangelists often talk about the need for a person to develop a “sense of sin” before they can experience salvation. In other words, “let us help you develop a guilt complex so you can compensate for it with the same delusions we have.”

  8. Unruly Simian says:

    I have asked many a Christian about the person on a secluded island/contenant/place who did not know about Jese etc. All have responded they are going staight to hell if they don’t beleive in Jesus! I always smile and walk away….

  9. Genghis Cohn says:

    To be fair, the quran doesn’t say: if you don’t believe in the quran you’ll burn in hell. What it actually says, according to most muslims, is: if you don’t believe in the quran when you know about it you’ll burn in hell, which isn’t quite as vile as the traditional christian one: unless you’re the right kind of christiuan. you’ll burn in hell.

  10. J Ascher says:

    The title of Mo’s publication is so very apt for this strip! Way to go, Author.

  11. Tumsup says:

    When the last Inca emperor was about to be executed by the Christians they offered him a chance to be baptized.
    ‘Why?’ he asked.
    ‘So you can go to heaven’
    ‘Are there Christians in heaven?’
    ‘Heaven is filled with Christians’
    ‘Fuck that’*
    Then they strangled him.

    *I don’t speak Inca so that’s a rough translation.

  12. @Tumsup I hope the translation is accurate.

    @Runar Only a Christian could encounter a culture with no word for “sin” or “war” or “evil” and see that as a problem. Thanks for that.

    @Chip Camden Spot on. Good analysis. The pity of it is that they start with their children, raising whole generations of fucked up, sexually repressed, guilt haunted (for sins they never committed) delusional people. If ever there was an “evil” idea it is “original sin”.

  13. durham669 says:

    “The very concept of sin comes from the bible. Christianity offers to solve a problem of its own making! Would you be thankful to a person who cut you with a knife in order to sell you a bandage?” – [Dan Barker, Losing Faith in Faith]

  14. If you not belive in the koran,you are on higway to hell. But i have heard some one said thats hell is wery wery cold place. Not a warm place, maybe its warm places and cold places in hell?

  15. emmi says:

    i’ve recently read and interview with a nun who was working as a missionary somewhere in Africa, and she said something like – ‘since they have no proper religion, these people view sex as something normal and natural, often they do it just for fun, and we’re doing our best to make them feel ashamed about it and stop’ …reminded me of that old joke about puritanism, that it’s haunting fear that somebody, somewhere might be having fun…


    What one claims beyond all dispute
    Another may claim to refute
    So the “truths” you are liable
    To find in the Bible
    Or Koran are far from absolute

  17. Peakcrew says:

    Nice name, HOSANNAS ABJURED. Very clever (and a better limerick than NBH usually gives us, too)!


    NBH’s stuff is the only original verse you might assume was atrocious parody

  19. Alexis says:

    Another Eskimo story: The missionary was telling them of a lake of fire that burned forever without going out. An Eskimo asked “How can we get to this wonderful place?”


    Quit laughing at God’s Frozen People

  21. Peakcrew says:

    @HA: With that atrocious pun, you have undone all your good work 🙂

  22. Pleased says:

    This is the most tounge in cheek, bold but completely non malicious, comic strip imaginable. I
    just wonder can you put sometimes same unbiased humorous Jew character in mix with no offence?


    At least I know when my efforts are atrocious. NBH takes himself way too seriously

  24. Author says:

    @Pleased – Thank you. Nice of you to say so. As sMoo has pointed out, Moses makes regular appearances.

  25. ottebrain says:

    Isn’t it sort of a catch 22?


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