Random Comic
elite

elite

Another true joke, courtesy of the Vatican.




Discussion (36)¬

  1. Brilliant again, Author. Bravo.

  2. Pezter says:

    Well, that’s gonna work, I’m sure….

    Nice to see the Catholics continuing to march boldly backwards.

  3. Well it is all the libarals’ fault, after all.

  4. AchillesAndTortoise says:

    Hopefully with the Catholic Church fleeing back to the dark ages the more liberal catholics will just up and leave the church completely… Am I too optimistic?

  5. Maggs says:

    Ah, AchillesAndTortoise, that’s great, it’ll balance up the C of E people who defected to the Roman church in recent years… might it make them think a bit too and join the ranks of those who prefer reality to make-believe?

  6. Eric Martin says:

    My first reaction was that they really don’t have a clue! Then I had a dreadful realisation that they know their “flock” better than I do.

  7. Maggs says:

    @”…dreadful realisation that they know their “flock”…”

    That is indeed a dreadful realisation, for those of us who thought we were liberals and couldn’t conceive of condoning the behaviour of practising paedophiles. Condoning stuff previously disapproved of in one’s culture is what liberals do isn’t it! Bl@@*y ‘ell!

  8. “VATICAN investigators to Ireland appointed by Pope Benedict XVI are to clamp down”

    Haven’t they heard, those techniques are outdated. Nowadays the inquisition puts people in the comfy chair and pokes them with the soft cushion.

    “Cardinal Sean Brady, the Primate of All Ireland and Archbishop of Armagh.”

    And similarly, this guy had someone kick him in the shin part way through his introduction. He was going to say “Archbishop of Armenia.” Or maybe he meant the Cam-argh. Also, to be the Primate of All Ireland he’d have to be even bigger than King Kong.

    Too many jokes available in that article, including the meta-joke of its content.

  9. numsix says:

    Please stop calling them Pedophiles; they are Child Rapists.

  10. FedupwithR says:

    AchillesAndTortoise: The Catholic Church isn’t fleeing backwards to the Dark Ages. It’s being yanked from the Dark Ages into the modern world and being obliged to admit that our planet goes around the sun and that Darwin was right.

  11. nina says:

    yes, truly the problem to be solved is the people who identify the problems.

    sound about right for any workplace

  12. Marie-Thérèse O' Loughlin says:

    In a statement regarding the visitation, the Vatican said:

    “Through this visitation, the Holy See intends to offer assistance to the bishops, clergy, religious and lay faithful as they seek to respond adequately to the situation caused by the tragic cases of abuse perpetrated by priests and religious upon minors. It is also intended to contribute to the desired spiritual and moral renewal that is already being vigorously pursued by the Church in Ireland.”

    http://tinyurl.com/28kynew

    The New York Times > http://tinyurl.com/27r2r8f

    “The team will also include Archbishop Thomas Christopher Collins of Toronto and Archbishop Terrence Thomas Prendergast of Ottawa.”

    The Irish State is giving the Prelates free rein to do what ever they like. You can bet your bottom dollar there will be a grand reception for them during their time here.

  13. Unruly Simian says:

    What exactly are blasphemy pants…??? Makes me think of assless chaps….

  14. Marie-Thérèse O' Loughlin says:

    The Murphy Report, which covered Dublin, was already investigated. As Marie Collins pointed out to the New York Times, why ever is it on the agenda again with the Prelates? The Ferns Diocese, which covered Wexford, has also been done and dusted. Methinks there will not be too much to talk about that one, as that is the one which Colm O’ Gorman brought to the fore, and he would be a force to be reckoned with indeed.

    http://tinyurl.com/2ckwmue

    http://tinyurl.com/2eyqac3

  15. Neuseline says:

    The infamous Cormack Murphy-O’Connor, who uttered that we atheists cannot be fully human because we do not seek the transcendence, has been appointed to the team as well. Does Rat-Singer not know that Cormack Mashed Potato was himself involved in a cover up?

  16. Anonymous Fan says:

    I was in El Salvador in April. I asked people there what they thought of the child-rapist scandal. They said it was hardly even news… because people in Latin America already knew things like that happened all the time in the church.

  17. Bhima says:

    “In the wake of the shocking Murphy report into clerical child abuse, the conservative Archbishop of New York, Timothy Dolan, will examine the study courses conducted for trainee priests…”

    Clearly, these priests would stop raping children if they had better training.

  18. not-jew says:

    I am wondering why Jesus n Mo have not made a comment about the attack on the floatilla by the Israeli Defence yet. Godforsaken ‘Holy’ Land?

  19. TheBlackCat says:

    “Does Rat-Singer not know that Cormack Mashed Potato was himself involved in a cover up?”

    I would suspect that is exactly why he was selected. Does this really look remotely like a real investigation to anyone?

  20. Richard Eis says:

    Anonymous Fan – I should point out that the irish knew too. There are plenty of pedo-priest jokes going back tens of years. This is all too little too late.

    This just looks like “marketing” to me anyway. Nothing more. You do not use foxes to help clean out your chicken coop.

  21. Headbhang says:

    I realize it’s sort of necessary due to the circumstances, but I find it funny how Mo, of all people, would consider pedophiles as a “satanic plague” and “sin-soaked perverts”. Has he forgotten about Aisha already?

  22. plente says:

    @Headbhang: When Mo does it, it’s not wrong! Classic double standard.

  23. nina says:

    I was watching a 1970′s BBC comedy show called “Yes, Minister” – it’s about government employees – the lead civil servant character explains to the Minister of the Dept that people are not upset about events occuring – they are only upset when they are advised of them.

    People have known for decades sexual abuse happens, that spousal battery happens – and these were long considered background normal operating proceedures – and it does seem to be that we only care about an issue when it directly impacts us or is stirred up by mostly by the media.

    When I think about the last 40 years in Vancouver where I live – there are 2 riots that occured – one was about 20 years ago when the cable company did “negative option billing” you got channels for a ree trial and had to actively cancel them or be deemed to accept charges for them once the trial was over – people cancelled cable en mass

    and about 15 years ago when the Canucks lost the Stanley cup to the Rangers – there was 2 days of riots

    we don’t get up in arms over anything else but what we see or don’t on tv

  24. Stonyground says:

    Unruly Simian, the story behind the blasphemous pants went down in India. A retailer was selling touristy underwear with pictures of famous world landmarks on them. One particular product contained an image of a French cathedral which happened to have a dome on it. Hundreds of idiot Muslims mistook the cathedral for a mosque and went on the rampage in their usual way.

  25. ketil w.grevstad says:

    brilliant, i want some blasphmey pants. I think it is a great idea

  26. MrGronk says:

    @Stoneyground
    “Is that a minaret on the front of your undies or are you just pleased to see me?”

  27. Uncle Roger says:

    @Bhima “Clearly, these priests would stop GETTING CAUGHT raping children if they had better training.”

    FTFY.

  28. AchillesAndTortoise says:

    I say castrate the priests. They’re supposed to be celibate anyway, what do they need ‘em for?

  29. Your job is getting way to easy…..

  30. Daoloth says:

    Honestly, author- this stuff just writes itself. I thought that “blasphemy pants” was just background noise until I followed the link. You must feel like the satirist Tom Lehrer when he said he felt like giving up when Henry Kissinger was given the nobel peace prize…

  31. Unruly Simian says:

    @Stonyground – Thanks a bunch for that info….I really get a kick out of the “head lines” that Author graciously supplies..Peace be unto Author…

  32. Nassar Beh Houdja says:

    Liberal – someone so open minded their brain fell out.

  33. Cygnia says:

    Does J only care about fundie Catholics or does he touch on all fundie Christian sects?

  34. Didac says:

    ‘An emphasis will be placed on an evangelisation campaign to overcome the alienation of young people scandalised by the spate of sexual abuse of children and by later cover-ups of paedophile clerics by leaders of the institutional church.’

    So, now they call it ‘evangelisation.’

  35. MercedesCorrosion says:

    This makes me violently ILL … I don´t know whether to puke or laugh when I read that article about the Vatican shit action. “An emphasis will be placed on an evangelisation campaign to overcome the alienation of young people scandalised by the spate of sexual abuse of children and by later cover-ups of paedophile clerics by leaders of the institutional church.”

    Yes, let’s lure the kids back in with more lies! “Come over to the dark side.. we have cookies.. and we DON’T rape children.. so much”

  36. fenchurch says:

    @numsix – I’m with you on the distinctions between a pedophile and an actual molester or child rapist. The former is not a crime but an unfortunate condition, and the latter two are people who have committed acts.

    It would be great of the usage of the word could better separate the various meanings, and focus on help for the pedophiles, and help and effective, deterring punishment for those who have abused a child.

    @MercedesCorrosion: don’t forget they also have wine, Cheezus, and crackers.

Comment¬

NOTE: This comments section is provided as a safe place for readers of J&M to talk, to exchange jokes and ideas, to engage in profound philosophical discussion, and to ridicule the sincerely held beliefs of millions. As such, comments of a racist, sexist or homophobic nature will not be tolerated.

If you are posting for the first time, or you change your username and/or email, your comment will be held in moderation until approval. When your first comment is approved, subsequent comments will be published automatically.