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That’s true actually. The difference in the old Hebrew between “virgin” and “young woman” is only one letter, or something.
Mind you, Lutherans got around that by saying the Holy Spirit didnt impregnate Mary, but rather entered the unborn child after Jospeph knocked her up…..
Woah. I didn’t realize this! The story is clearly bunk, but I didn’t realize there was actual evidence *within* the bible itself. Got some links for us?
r00db00y is wrong. The Isaiah prophesy says: Here the maiden lady will give birth to a son…
The “maiden lady” is a translation of “Ha-gvira Ha-alma”.
“Ha-gvira” means a high born lady; “ha-alma” means a young unmarried woman. The original Hebrew points to a young unmarried woman of an aristocratic family.
That’s just the intention; to keep people worshipping it. Gone are the lessons of good-will to all, do unto others and thou shalt not do (lets be honest) bad things like kill, steal, lie and give one to your best mates missus, all replaced with “this is the word of the Lord”, an eye for an eye (actually, these days it’s more like “an eye for a tooth, a tooth for an eye”), guilt, fear and celibacy.
It’s no secret that the original texts have not only been severely mistranslated, but edited so as to be unrecognisable as what was originally scribed. All to keep various churches (namely the Catholics) in positions of power through PR.
In the Greek translation of the Old Testament, made by Jews in Egypt in the 2nd century BC, Isaiah 7:14 reads “virgin”, not “young woman.”
This suggests that the original Jewish understanding long before Christianity even existed was that a “virgin” would conceive.
In the Bible a “sign” means a miracle (Jesus was often asked by doubters for a “sign” so that they could believe.) A young woman conceiving is hardly a “sign”, a miracle. This happens every minute of the day. A virgin conceiving would however be a “sign”.
It seems that Jews originally believed that a virgin would miraculously conceive. Then, after Christains claimed Jesus was born of a virgin, Jews changed their story and claimed that the 200 BC translation was in error.
Roodboy – What are you talking about? I grew up Lutheran, in a relatively liberal branch of the church, and the virgin birth was believed there. Which branch(es) of Lutheranism believe that?
You’ve got it all wrong, infidels. Now keep this to yourselves, but word on the street is that Mary had the medical condition known as an anal fistula – that is: a hole between the anal and the vaginal tubes, don’t look it up on google images – which can cause women visited through the back door to become miraculously impregnated. Bad birth-control tactic, but what were Mary and Joseph to do in those olden days?
‘t Zaller, Mary was not membrane-impaired, she merely had a parthenogenetic offspring. This happens in zoos even with multi-cellular critters such as lizards and birds when the sexes are separated for generations. It probably happens every so often with primates, Great Apes and Hominids.
Of course, parthenogenesis almost always produces females … this should tell us something quite important about the god, the ghost and the girl.
It would also handily explain how she [the Jesus girly] managnged to attract and keep interested a dozen hard-working, macho males. Girlies have no problem gathering a bunch of loose workers. Indeed, their difficulty is often both getting rid of the unwanted spares and restraining the ones they keep.
Jesus was a girly. See the documentary “Dogma” for details.
‘t Zaller, Mary was not membrane-impaired, she merely had a parthenogenetic offspring. This happens in zoos even with multi-cellular critters such as lizards and birds when the sexes are separated for generations. It probably happens every so often with primates, Great Apes and Hominids.
Of course, parthenogenesis almost always produces females … this should tell us something quite important about the god, the ghost and the girl.
It would also handily explain how she [the Jesus girly] managnged to attract and keep interested a dozen hard-working, macho males. Girlies have no problem gathering a bunch of loose workers. Indeed, their difficulty is often both getting rid of the unwanted spares and restraining the ones they keep.
Jesus was a girly. See the documentary “Dogma” for details.
@tinkling think – That’s a solid take. And to all a Happy New Common Era Year of a relatively arbitrary and made up calendar based on a delayed calculation further degraded by incompatibility with rotational and orbital mechanics.
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That’s true actually. The difference in the old Hebrew between “virgin” and “young woman” is only one letter, or something.
Mind you, Lutherans got around that by saying the Holy Spirit didnt impregnate Mary, but rather entered the unborn child after Jospeph knocked her up…..
….which makes much more sense :-p ๐
Woah. I didn’t realize this! The story is clearly bunk, but I didn’t realize there was actual evidence *within* the bible itself. Got some links for us?
Why is everything about Christianity so badly wrong and intentionally mistranslated and people keep worshipping it?
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r00db00y is wrong. The Isaiah prophesy says: Here the maiden lady will give birth to a son…
The “maiden lady” is a translation of “Ha-gvira Ha-alma”.
“Ha-gvira” means a high born lady; “ha-alma” means a young unmarried woman. The original Hebrew points to a young unmarried woman of an aristocratic family.
TB,
That’s just the intention; to keep people worshipping it. Gone are the lessons of good-will to all, do unto others and thou shalt not do (lets be honest) bad things like kill, steal, lie and give one to your best mates missus, all replaced with “this is the word of the Lord”, an eye for an eye (actually, these days it’s more like “an eye for a tooth, a tooth for an eye”), guilt, fear and celibacy.
It’s no secret that the original texts have not only been severely mistranslated, but edited so as to be unrecognisable as what was originally scribed. All to keep various churches (namely the Catholics) in positions of power through PR.
Noga,
I stand corrected, thanx.
So (according to Lutherans) did Junior have two souls?
Out of curiosity, how does the Trinity thing interact with the possibility of an Oedipus complex?
In the Greek translation of the Old Testament, made by Jews in Egypt in the 2nd century BC, Isaiah 7:14 reads “virgin”, not “young woman.”
This suggests that the original Jewish understanding long before Christianity even existed was that a “virgin” would conceive.
In the Bible a “sign” means a miracle (Jesus was often asked by doubters for a “sign” so that they could believe.) A young woman conceiving is hardly a “sign”, a miracle. This happens every minute of the day. A virgin conceiving would however be a “sign”.
It seems that Jews originally believed that a virgin would miraculously conceive. Then, after Christains claimed Jesus was born of a virgin, Jews changed their story and claimed that the 200 BC translation was in error.
Roodboy – What are you talking about? I grew up Lutheran, in a relatively liberal branch of the church, and the virgin birth was believed there. Which branch(es) of Lutheranism believe that?
You’ve got it all wrong, infidels. Now keep this to yourselves, but word on the street is that Mary had the medical condition known as an anal fistula – that is: a hole between the anal and the vaginal tubes, don’t look it up on google images – which can cause women visited through the back door to become miraculously impregnated. Bad birth-control tactic, but what were Mary and Joseph to do in those olden days?
‘t Zaller, Mary was not membrane-impaired, she merely had a parthenogenetic offspring. This happens in zoos even with multi-cellular critters such as lizards and birds when the sexes are separated for generations. It probably happens every so often with primates, Great Apes and Hominids.
Of course, parthenogenesis almost always produces females … this should tell us something quite important about the god, the ghost and the girl.
It would also handily explain how she [the Jesus girly] managnged to attract and keep interested a dozen hard-working, macho males. Girlies have no problem gathering a bunch of loose workers. Indeed, their difficulty is often both getting rid of the unwanted spares and restraining the ones they keep.
Jesus was a girly. See the documentary “Dogma” for details.
‘t Zaller, Mary was not membrane-impaired, she merely had a parthenogenetic offspring. This happens in zoos even with multi-cellular critters such as lizards and birds when the sexes are separated for generations. It probably happens every so often with primates, Great Apes and Hominids.
Of course, parthenogenesis almost always produces females … this should tell us something quite important about the god, the ghost and the girl.
It would also handily explain how she [the Jesus girly] managnged to attract and keep interested a dozen hard-working, macho males. Girlies have no problem gathering a bunch of loose workers. Indeed, their difficulty is often both getting rid of the unwanted spares and restraining the ones they keep.
Jesus was a girly. See the documentary “Dogma” for details.
@tinkling think – That’s a solid take. And to all a Happy New Common Era Year of a relatively arbitrary and made up calendar based on a delayed calculation further degraded by incompatibility with rotational and orbital mechanics.