hear

June 24th, 2015

Thanks to Parrot132Β and a hat tip toΒ @motheatheist.

└ Tags: , ,

Discussion (34)¬

  3. Bravissimo!

    And just as some wankers are never going to get laid, so some species are never going to be able to understand the cosmos in which they are the most epi- of epiphenomena.

    Religion, like wanking, is the consolatory next best thing. And like wanking, it will always be with us.

    Devoutly,

    S.

  5. LOL. Wonderful analogy beautifully illustrated.
    I’ve always thought a lot of religious folk were wankers.

    On the other hand I was just trying to work out whether it’s good or not to be part of the population who don’t …er… spank a creationist monkey.
    One of the redditors comes up with a great extension to maintain the solidity of atheist values: that means that Science is Sex.

    By the way, what did happen to the poster of Helena Christensen. Did Moses take it away with him? Was Mo just thinking of the barmaid? (I often do…)

  9. Is masturbation still referred to as “Punishing the Pope”?
    In a related note, my Samsung phone has a setting for one handed operation, almost like they knew what sort of sites I was going to be visiting.

  10. What about those that are intellectually curious, but also like a bit of solo action? You see I’ve got this friend…

  11. Argh, why no nice quick share buttons? OK, this needs to get manually tweeted anyway πŸ˜€ .

  12. I am offended that you would compare something as harmless as masturbation to something as sick and twisted as religion.

  14. Great strip, Author, and perfect punchline yet again.
    Unfortunately, the analogy breaks down. Unlike religion, wanking is good for you.* It releases all kinds of hormones that bring health and vitality. I would like to see us all stop dissing masturbation as a bad thing, or comparing it to evils like playing the bodhran or religion.

    *according to no less an authority than Ann Landers. By which statement she instantly became one of my heroes back in the sixties.

  16. I was just going to say that masturbation really loses by the comparison, but Darwin Harmless said it first. Orgasms are good for the health and do nobody any harm, unlike religion!
    But I agree it’s another great strip πŸ˜€

  17. It’s hard to compare unless you include the degree. A little religion can be an ok thing, as long as you don’t get caught up in it and let it control your life. The same could be said about masturbating. πŸ™‚

    Only someone who was mentally ill would take either to the extreme. The term ‘Chafer’ comes to mind… πŸ˜‰

  18. @banks
    You can get used to viewing the screen at awkward angles when you only have one hand available. Unless you have one of Jerry www’s samsungs that is… Maybe we should all put in a few quid to get one for J + M ?

  19. Playing the bodhran is not evil. However, two bodhrans being played at the same time is evil. A banjo on the other hand………….
    An interesting new joke for those aficionados of banjo jokes.

    What’s the difference between religion and playing the banjo?

    Oh, and top marks author. Definitely a top 5

  20. Mo must’ve got flustered. I’m pretty sure the bog doesn’t constitute a suitable place for prayer.

  22. Another basement dwelling pigeon
    Cashing in on bashing religion
    Missing the point, the silly old churl
    Afraid of a mere girl
    He plays with himself
    Just a smidgeon.

  25. The biological urge is to have sex, and not to reproduce. Sex is the means by which reproduction happens, but that is evolution being tricksy.

  27. According to Freud – Sigmund or Clement, I forget which – masturbation is a form of homosexuality, which I suppose is at least technically true. As there are only two types of peiople, those who masturbate and those who lie about it, basically this means we’re all gay. Tra la. My favourite euphemism is ‘milking the lizard’ – just the right combination of description and commentary.

  28. religion is like masturbation
    surely religion IS masturbation
    given that one is indulgent self-abuse concerning imaginary things, while the other is manipulation of the genitalia

  29. Hotrats, I’m also rather fond of “spanking the monkey”. Not quite as visually provocative as milking the lizard, but there’s something rather cute about it.

  30. The biological urge is to have thought, and not to believe. thought is the means by which belief happens, but that is evolution being tricksy.

  31. does this mean that the bible and quran are the equivalent of pornography

Comment¬

NOTE: This comments section is provided as a friendly place for readers of J&M to talk, to exchange jokes and ideas, to engage in profound philosophical discussion, and to ridicule the sincerely held beliefs of millions. As such, comments of a racist, sexist or homophobic nature will not be tolerated.

If you are posting for the first time, or you change your username and/or email, your comment will be held in moderation until approval. When your first comment is approved, subsequent comments will be published automatically.